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The Ivy League

November 01, 2002
Poison Ivy

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Shouldn't the fWo be able to keep former employee hackers like myself out of their database?

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Seattle, WA
November 1, 2002
3:22 AM

I'm drunk.

I'm not gonna lie to you - I'm really, really, REALLY drunk right now. And tonight was either a spectacular success or a screeching failure, depending on what side of the fence you're on.

When the fWo officially entered a hiatus, we were worried. When the entire roster was fired, we were outraged. When that abysmal house show went down over the summer, we were embarrassed. Now, this pay- per- view wasn't even worthy of a cable descrambler.

But besides all of that, tonight was one of the most kickass nights of the year for me.

If you saw the show, you know what officially went down. Needless to say, Eli Flair and I crashed the party. We had bought tickets to the event on the advice of Seattle native Evan Aho - and considering the hassle we dealt with to get through the gate, it's a wonder I didn't bring my Singapore Cane along.

For a "fake" sport - it certainly inspires enough "real" feelings. Like how Renshaw and Reborn tried their best to be hardcore but just didn't get it done.

You don't want a "fake" update, tho - you want a "real" one. You want to know what Ivy McGinnis, Brandon "Brand Frontier" Roche, and Lance "Alex Newsome" Knight are up to. Amongst others, of course.

There's a bar in Seattle whose name I can't remember that Evan Aho introduced me to a year or so ago that I told everyone in the parking lot to head to, at least to say hello, when the PPV was over. Well, not everyone was gonna get kicked out of the arena like Eli and I were.

We gotta be we, what can I say?

It was like old times, tho - with a twist. Sean was busy with SCW commitments and showed up with the rabble at the end of the show -but he was there. Brandon walked in the door at about 10:15, before the show ended. It was me, Eli, Brand, and Evan Aho drinking to each others' health for about a half hour before the PPV let out and the REAL fWo roster showed up - and it was almost exactly like old times.

The second Tempest walked through the door, I can guarantee you the boys who knew us were torn between being happy over one of the closest friendships in wrestling history being reunited, and apprehension over who was going to be our practical joke target that night.

Ivan was there - and don't ask me why Tempest had soap bubbles- in- a- bottle on her, but Ivan was hiccuping soap bubbles all night long. And while he should've been angry about it because everyone was laughing - I think Tempest is rubbing off on him because all he did was laugh. His multitude of Sambvca shots might've had something to do with it but I think she's having a positive influence on him.

Where am I right now?

Eli and I were the only people who seemed to think ahead and get hotel rooms for the night. Sure, he could've driven home to Los Angeles with a day to spare, but I wasn't about to fly to Seattle for a night and then go home. So, of course, there are about ten people asleep on my hotel room floor tonight.

Sean looks very content right next to me, Ivan is cuddling with Tempest right by the heater, and that's all I really care about right now. Those two are retarded for each other and it's about time they realized it. Ivan is probably more passed out than asleep but if I drank a gallon and a half of vodka I'd be in the same state, so he's forgiven.

The PPV?

Read the results in the IWC, I don't really care. Do you know what happened to me tonight? I walked into the bar, and as the PPV ended Paul came in, Lance Knight came in, Tempest and Ivan came in, Ric came in - fuck, the entire fuckin' fWo roster of old came in and we drank together. That's what it's all about.

I know, I know - this business is supposed to be about putting on a show for the fans to remember for as long as they're interested in the fWo promotion, but tonight, that doesn't matter. Hell, I've burned bridges in my day, but these are my favorite people in the world to drink with.

Even when eight to ten of them are passed out on my floor.

I know some of you are probably looking for a PPV report. Tough shit, I'm in too good a mood to be thinking about work.

If I feel like it, tomorrow, I'll give you my thoughts on the Halloween Hell effort, and I'll tell you exactly what's been happening since the last episode of Unleashed.

If you can handle it, at least.

Yeah, this column had nothing to do with wrestling. But neither did Halloween Hell. I'd say we're even.

This is Ivy.